What to Do When Your Spouse Refuses for Marriage Counseling?

When a spouse disagrees with attending marriage counseling, you should be prepared for lots of questions. 

You might be wondering what the next step is or whether the refusal was simply a tactic used by your spouse to avoid going through the process. Before making any final decisions, read on! 

This article details this situation and provides advice on what to do when your spouse refuses marriage counseling.

Marriage Counseling

Make an Appointment for Yourself as Well 

You don’t have to wait for your partner to take action before you start making changes to your relationship, and there’s no reason why you shouldn’t be able to work on these issues even if they’re still being resolved! 

By scheduling an appointment with a counselor yourself, you’ll give yourself some time away from the stress of the situation. While also letting your partner know that there’s someone who cares enough about the two of you.

Talk about Counseling in a Positive Way

Talk about counseling in a positive way. When you’re having trouble communicating with your spouse and want to try and make it easier, starting with a positive approach is essential. If you can start by being completely open with them, they will be more likely to listen.

This will surely help you to avoid any negative feelings lurking in the back of your mind. It’s important to remember how much it can improve your relationship with your spouse and help you communicate better. 

Ask your spouse if they have ever thought about marriage counseling or if they would be open to trying it.

Talk to Your Spouse about their Feelings

First, you should never try to force your spouse into marriage counseling if they do not want it. If they are unwilling to talk about their feelings with you, then there will be no progress in the relationship, and the issue may continue unresolved for years.

Try conversing with your spouse about what’s happening in your life rather than pressing them to seek therapy. This helps them come up with new ideas about how they can improve things for themselves and each other.

Try a Couples Workshop

When your spouse doesn’t want marriage counseling, knowing what to do might be challenging. You might think there is nothing else you can do. Another option is a workshop for couples.

Couples workshops give each partner a chance to talk about their feelings and work through issues together without anyone feeling judged or criticized.

It also allows you to work on communication skills to resolve issues more quickly down the road.


These are a few options for you to try at home, but ultimately you may want to seek professional help.  

Remember that communication is the key, and though there may be tough times at first, it will ultimately get better. For many marriages, Couples therapy isn’t a waste of time but rather a chance to learn more about each other and their relationship.

Owen McEvilly

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